Your Favourite Shirt

You gave me your favourite shirt

Shiny new buttons and free from dirt

You spilled wine down the front

And it stained the back

You said "I don't want none of your complaining jack"

Two negatives make a positive

I'm so clever

I'm returning your favourite shirt

Buttons all off

Sleeves smeared with dirt

I set fire to the fabric but it remained intact

Do you take me for a pyromaniac?

Do you take for a walk in the garden?

Never