One of Us Cannot Be Wrong

I lit a thin green candle

To make you jealous of me

But the room just filled up with mosquitoes

They heard that my body was free

Then I took the dust from a long sleepless night

And I put it in your little shoe

And then I confess that I tortured the dress

That you wore for the world to look through

I showed my heart to the doctor

He said I'd just have to quit

Then he wrote himself a prescription

And your name was mentioned in it

Then he locked himself in a library shelf

With the details of our honeymoon

And I hear from the nurse that he's gotten much worse

And his practice is all in a ruin

Yes I heard of a saint who had loved you

So I studied all night in his school

He taught that the duty of lovers

Is to tarnish the golden rule

And just when I was sure that his teachings were pure

He drowned himself in the pool

His body is gone but back here on the lawn

His spirit continues to drool

An Eskimo showed me a movie

He'd recently taken of you

The poor man could hardly stop shivering

His lips and his fingers were blue

I suppose that he froze when the wind took your clothes

And I guess he just never got warm

But you stand there so nice in your blizzard of ice

Oh please, let me come into the storm