The Central Scrutinizer

Sometimes when you're not looking he

Just sneaks up on

You he looks like a cheap sort of flying

Saucer about five feet across

With a snout-like megaphone

Apparatus in the front with two big eye

Nted like appletons with miniature

Motorized frowning chrome

Eyebrows over them along the side of

His disc-like body are several

Sets of stupid-looking

Headers and exhaust hoses which apparentl

Pel him and punctuate his dialogue

With horrible smelling smoke

Rings in the middle of his head we

Can see an airport wind

Sock and constantly twirling

Anemometer the bottom of him has a landi

Ght and three spoked wheels in

Spite of all this

It is obvious that the way he really gets

Around is by being dangled from place

To place by a union guy with a

Dark green shirt up in the roof

S eating a sandwich

(pieces of which drop off every once in

A while and lodge themselves near

The hole where they put the oil

In that makes the cheap smoke)

He hovers into view and speaks to us thusly

Central scrutinizer:

This is the central scrutinizerit is

My responsibility to enforce

All the laws that haven't been passed yet

It is also my responsibility

To alert each and

Every one of you to the potential c

Uences of various ordinary

Everyday activities you might be performing

Which could eventually lead to

The death penalty

(or affect your parents' credit rating)

Our criminal institutions are f

F little creeps like you who do

Wrong thingsand many of them

Were driven to these crimes by

A horrible force called music!

Our studies have shown that this

Horrible force is so

Dangerous to society at large

That laws are being

Drawn up at this very moment to stop it

Forever! cruel and inhuman punishments

Are being c

Lly described in tiny paragraphs so they

Won't conflict with the constitution

(which, it'self, is being modified in order

To accommodate the future)

I bring you now a special

Presentation to show what

Can happen to you if you choose a

Career in musicthe white zone

Is for loading and

Unloading onlyif you have to load or unload

Go to th te zone you'll love itit's a way of

Lifeha, ha, ha, ha, hahi, it's me

I'm back this is the central

Scrutinizerthe white zone is

For loading and unloading onlyif

Yah gotta loa if yah gotta unload

Go to the white zone you'll

Love itit's a way of life that's right

You'll

Love it, it's a way of life, that's right

You'll love it, it's a way of life

You'll love i

Is, is, the central scrutinizer!