Tig Ol' bitties

It was the first day back to school

Cuttin' up in class, actin' like a tool

Friends were rollin' in, we started talkin' about the summer

Deejay saw Twilight, "Bummer!"

I spoke up, and I asked my friends

"Are there any new girls? 9's or 10's?"

Hopin' a few hotties had moved from other cities

And in walked this girl with tig ol' bitties

Woo, I can't believe my eyes

In a contest, they'd win first prize

Double-D guarantee, I was checkin' their size

It's like two beach balls in a shirt disguise

Or Earth and Mars having some fun

Wait, I take that back it's like two of the Sun

But at this point I let my mind run

And drifted off thinking about them tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties, Mt. Fuji brought it's twin

Tig ol' bitties, two melons in a shirt

Tig ol' bitties (Tig ol' bitties)

I put books in my lap

Tig ol' bitties, head bobbing as she walks

Tig ol' bitties

Oh my god!

Tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties

Kept trippin' in class 'cause of her dang breasts

In a tiny white shirt, boobs having a fiesta

Later in lab, we were messin' with test tubes

Couldn't take my eyes off the new girl's chest

Boobs!

Wasn't paying attention

Got busted, had to serve detention

In biology we talked about the bees, the best kind of bees

Boobies!

Woo, I can't believe my mind

I hold a poker face to her two of a kind

With each step her breasts gettin' redefined

I'm making my move, I'm thinking it's time

Oh snap!

I'm gonna ask her to prom

And in my head she responds, "You're the bomb!"

Feeling nervous, so I count to three

"I like your boobs, go to prom with me?"

Tig ol' bitties, King Kong boobs

Tig ol' bitties, great tracks of land

Tig ol' bitties (Tig ol' bitties)

Like my balls

Tig ol' bitties, real big

Tig ol' bitties, oh my god

Tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties

Tig ol' bitties

She said yes, so I'm getting ready

Stain on my shirt, Mom's spaghetti

I pick her up and I'm pretty sure

That she'll let me motorboat like

I try to cop a feel once we get to school

She said, "No touching, that's the rule"

Principal walks up on the scene

"It's time to announce prom king and queen

Your Favorite Martian and Tig Ol' Bitties

Congratulations to you both on winning"

Time slowed down and she jumped for joy

Then out of her dress jumped something more

Tissues flew and rained from the sky

"Oh my god! You stuff your shirt?"

Your Favorite Martian in a world of hurt

Aw, fake ol' bitties

Wow, fake ol' bitties

You're breaking my heart with fake ol' bitties

You're crushing my dreams with fake ol' bitties

(Fake ol' bitties)

I can't believe it, fake ol' bitties

You really suck, fake ol' bitties

I can't believe you would do that, fake ol' bitties

(Fake ol' bitties)

Why would you do that when you're just trying to get everyone's attention?

Those aren't boobs, they're lies!

Lies, I tell you!

But you know, I'm still down to make out if you

If you want to, want to come back with me

You know what? Never mind

(Where them tig ol' bitties at?)