Max Von Side-Eye

[Intro]

Two, three

They call you Max von Side-Eye, ooh

Max von Side-Eye, ooh

[Verse 1]

'Cause even a prostitute has got to do a task or two for takin' it, honey

Given the cost of you, it's something to remember when you're takin' my money, oh

And if it constitutes an absolutely capital offense to be lonely

And then if I asked you to come over soon, I hope you'd have the sense to ignore me, oh

[Pre-Chorus]

Ooh, child

Too wild

A song about you just writes itself

[Chorus]

They call you Max von Side-Eye, senior quote was Bright Eyes

Lingers in the corridor and rents a room in FiDi

Searching for the right guy, lonely in the nighttime

[Verse 2]

And, baby, if it's a prostitute approximates the way it makes you feel when you hold me

Then I'll throw caution to the wind and I'll be real and I won't feel like a phony, oh

And then if it constitutes an absolutely capital offense to be lonely

Then if I asked you to come over soon, I hope you'd have the sense to ignore me, oh

[Pre-Chorus]

Ooh, child

That smile

Are you taking care of yourself?

[Chorus]

They call you Max von Side-Eye, crazy lookin' right eye

Transferred here from Oregon and majoring in tie-dye

Met her in the Flatiron, said she was a night owl

[Verse 3]

'Cause even a prostitute has got to do a task or two for takin' it, honey

And given the cost of you, it's something to remember when you're takin' my money, oh

And if it constitutes an absolutely capital offense to be lonely

Then if I asked you to come over soon, I hope you'd have the sense to ignore me, oh

[Instrumental Outro]