The Ballad Of Lucy + Ted

[Verse 1]

Twilight on a Brooklyn night

Twilight on a Brooklyn night

The zoo was closed, it was after five

Lucy and Teddy were still alive

[Verse 2]

Three young boys snuck into the zoo

They intended going swimming in the polar bear pool

Little Juan Perez squirmed through the fence

At eleven years old she shoulda had more sense

[Verse 3]

Lucy and Ted were asleep in their lair

Lucy woke and said, "Ted, I hear something out there"

Ted saw Juan swimming 'cross the moat

He pullеd him out, dragged him back in the lair

Juan's two friends got thе heck outta there, yeah

[Verse 4]

Screams rang through the Brooklyn Zoo

Screams rang through the Brooklyn night

When the cops got there, they saw quite a sight

Juan had dwindled to just a few bites

[Verse 5]

Twenty shotgun blasts killed Ted and Lucy dead

They called the doctor, they called the vet

They cut 'em open under bright floodlights

The vet said there ain't no bodies inside

[Verse 6]

Lucy was thirty-three, Ted, he was thirty-two

Two happy healthy polar bears living in the Brooklyn Zoo

[Verse 7]

Now boys will be boys and polar bears, they will be bears

And Juan wouldn't have got et if he hadn't gone in there

And some may scream and some may swear

But I am on the side of the polar bears, yeah

[Outro]

And some may scream and some may swear

But I am on the side of those poor polar bears