Whip Your Kids

I don't know if you're aware, but your kids suck ass

If you need someone to whip 'em then, ha just ask

'Cause they ain't as perfect as you say they is

They ain't perfect at all

You're raising bebe's kids

I'm sorry, I don't know you

I don't mean to get pissy

But you need to discipline your bratty kids, you hippy

Like come here you little jerk

Taste the back of my palm

But you ain't my daddy!

Nah, but I'm doing your mom

Now I know you think they're angels

But they're driving me insane

I'll punch a baby in the face

Just for cryin' on a plane

'Cause I don't mess around

You need to control 'em or I'll lose it

(But I made you a drawing)

Shut the fuck up, kid. that's stupid

Now I'm a get my truck

I'm a load all my boys in back

I'm a find out where you live and break all your toys in half

And I know it ain't your birthday

But when nobody's lookin'

I'm a give you a little present

(What?) An ass-whoopin'

Please may I whip your kids? (Whip your kids)

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I never ever thought I'd say a kid deserved to get hit

But it's obvious time-out ain't working for shit!

Yeah, I've seen your parenting style, it ain't all that

You gotta hit the little brat with a whiffle ball bat

'Cause this is obviously more than just a youthful rebellion

You gotta belt the little hellions with a belt when they're yellin'

'Cause you don't want me to do it

'Cause I'll paint their little brains all over the wall

When I spank 'em with a chainsaw

And why are they acting wild and loose?

If they deserve the ass-whoopin', it ain't child abuse

When I'm tryin' to buy groceries, and they're muckin' up my style

They're like drunkin' little midgets runnin' up and down the aisle

Touching everything in sight, and geez for christ's sake

I think one of 'em just stuck his little penis in my cake

And now I'm a have to put it back and get a new one and it bugs me

But mommy says I'm beautiful

Shut the fuck up kid, you're ugly

Please may I whip your kids? (Whip your kids)

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I can't stand kids misbehaving, running around and disobeying

All they need is a kick in the pants

A punt in the butt

A lesson that will finally shut 'em up

Please, let me whip your children

Please, let me whip your kids

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Oh, come on people, it's a joke

We would never hit anyone's kid, come on

I love kids

Come here and give me a hug you little rugrats

Hey, what, what the, what?