Packard Goose

[Lyric Note 1]

Joe clutches the hood ornament of an ancient car

[Verse 1: Joe]

Maybe you thought I was the Packard Goose

(Ren-denen-den-eh)

Or the Ronald MacDonald of the nouveau-abstruse

Well fuck all them people, I don't need no excuse

For being what I am

Do you hear me, then?

[Verse 2: Joe]

All them rock 'n roll writers is the worst kind of sleaze

(Ren-denen-den-eh)

Selling punk like some new kind of English disease

Is that the wave of the future?

Aw, spare me please!

[Chorus: Joe]

Oh no, you gotta go

Who do you write for? I wanna know

I believe you is the government's whore

And keeping peoples dumb (I'm really dumb)

Is where you're coming from

And keeping peoples dumb (I'm really dumb)

Is where you're coming from

[Verse 3: Joe]

Fuck all them writers with the pen in their hand

(Ren-denen-den-eh)

I will be more specific so they might understand

They can all kiss my ass but because it's so grand

They best just stay away

A-hey, hey, hey

[Chorus: Joe]

Hey, Joe, who did you blow?

Moe pushed the button boy, and you went to the show

Better suck a little harder or the shekels won't flow

And I don't mean your thumb (Don't mean your thumb)

So on your knees, you bum

Just tell yourself it's yum (Yourself it's yum)

And suck it till you're numb

[Post-Chorus: Joe]

Journalism's kinda scary

And of it, we should be wary

Wonder what became of Mary?

[Lyric Note 2]

And no sooner has he wondered, a vision of Mary appears to him, delivering a little lecture...

[Bridge: Voice Of Mary]

Hi! It's me, the girl from the bus

Remember? The last tour?

Well, information is not knowledge

Knowledge is not wisdom, wisdom is not truth

Truth is not beauty, beauty is not love

Love is not music, music is the best!

Wisdom is the domain of the Wis, which is extinct

Beauty is a French phonetic corruption

Of a short cloth neck ornament currently in resurgence

[Lyric Note 3]

And no sooner has she spoken (which is awkward and probably incorrect but what the fuck), enormous flabby short cloth neck ornament obscure the horizon in a multitude, beating their ugly wings and working their hidden chrome snap attachments as they resurge in the direction of the White Zone seeking snack material near the Utensil Shrines of Greater America...

[Instrumental Break 3:40 - 8:35]

[Guitar Solo]

[Verse 4: Joe]

If you're in the audience and like what we do

(Ren-denen-den-eh)

Well, we want you to know that we like you all too

But as for the sucker who will write the review

[Refrain: Joe]

If his mind is prehensile (Mind is prehensile)

He'll put down his pencil (Put down his pencil)

And have himself a squat on the cosmic utensil (Cosmic utensil)

Give it all you got on the cosmic utensil (Cosmic utensil)

Sit 'n spin until you rot on the cosmic utensil (Cosmic utensil)

He really needs to squat on the cosmic utensil (Cosmic utensil, cosmic utensil)

[Outro: Joe]

Now that I got that over with

I'll just play my imaginary guitar again

Hey, hah, soundin' pretty good there, me!

Ah, get down, uh!

Boy, what an imagination!

Love myself better than I love myself

I think

What tone!

Sounds like an Elegant Gypsy!

What is that?

Musk?

It's hip!