Down On The Farm

One, two

One, two

All I need is some inspiration

Before I do somebody some harm

I feel just like a vegetable

Down here on the farm

Nobody comes to see me

Nobody here to turn me on

I ain't even got a lover

Down here on the farm

They told me to get healthy

They told me to get some sun

But boredom eats me like cancer

Down here on the farm

Drinking lemonade shandy

Ain't nobody here to do me harm

But I'm like a fish out of water

Down here on the farm

I write a thousand letters

Till my fingers all gone numb

But I never see no postman

Down here on the farm

I call my baby on the telephone

I say, "Come down and have some fun"

But she knows what the score is

Down here on the farm

I can't fall in love with a wheatfield

I can't fall in love with a barn

When everything smells like horse shit

Down here on the farm

Blue skies and swimming pools

Add so much charm

But I'd rather be back in Soho

Than down here on the farm

On the fucking farm

Are you born in a fucking barn or what?

(Baaaa!)

Hold still